For those of us who didn't get an instruction manual with our babies and for whom parenting hasn't always gone as planned. On a more serious note this blog is about supporting a woman's ability to make her own choices about parenting including the choice, for whatever reason, to bottle feed her babies formula.

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Wednesday, April 16, 2008

When Your Child is the Instigator

I remember when my older son (OS) was just a tiny baby. When I looked at him, I imagined that he would always be gurgling and sweet. Alright I knew that he wouldn't remain like that forever but to be honest whenever I saw kids melting down I did secretly believe that OS wouldn't ever do such a thing. Come on, you haven't ever wondered if it was the parent? Be honest.

Over time, I have come to accept, begrudgingly, OS's temper tantrums. Today however I had a big realization: OS is an instigator. There I said it. It's true though.

Sally HP and I were getting ready to drive back from the Magic Wings aka the Butterfly Museum. She had bought butterfly lollipops for the kids. She even commented on how great the sticks were because they were plastic and thus wouldn't dissolve and get all gross like regular lollipop sticks do. I was impressed with her thoughtfulness. I was also impressed with the size of the sticks. I worried that OS would use it to poke at his brother or Sally's son. Fortunately the kids were all excited about the candy and quietly ate it.

Or so I thought. Then we heard a noise...kind of a scratching sound. I was baffled about what it could be. Then Sally asked OS to stop scratching the ceiling of her car with his lollipop. That's right, OS quickly figured out that the nice long lollipop pole stick could reach the ceiling. Oh, and he didn't finish eating the candy first. Of course, the other two boys wanted in on the game and before we knew it all three of them were scratching the ceiling with their wet sticky lollipops. I believe Sally indicated that this is what she should have expected from giving kids lollipops attached to the end of fishing poles. I can't say for sure because I was laughing so hard.

Of course OS stopped doing the scratching while YS continued. In fact even after YS finished his candy, in between ceiling scratches (hope Sally's car ceiling is cleaner than mine), he still was waving the stick around oblivious to the fact that the game had been over for a while.

I'm sure that OS has been an instigator before today. In fact, I would bet it's even happened more than once, particularly with his younger brother. I just wasn't as aware of his new status as that kid. Since as the younger sibling, YS always follows the trends after his brother is done finished, it appears like they are his idea

Sally HP's Lesson Learned: Do not give children lollipops with long sticks when enclosed places.

A. Elliot's Lesson Learned: At some point your sweet baby will become that kid.

To read about our trip to Magic Wings, (gotta love that name) click here.

Labels: ,

posted by Alex Elliot @ 7:11 AM   5 comments
5 Comments:
  • At 4/16/2008 7:14 AM, Blogger Whirlwind said…

    We love Magic Wings. Hum, I should have thought about going there this week. Oh well.

     
  • At 4/16/2008 7:38 AM, Blogger Sally HP said…

    Dude, he's not 'that kid' just 'a kid'...believe me, H will be on his heels in no time!

     
  • At 4/16/2008 8:37 AM, Blogger Heather said…

    Yeah, it stinks when you realize that your kid is the bad influence in the bunch. Although when parents of kids younger than mine give me those looks I usually just think, "yeah, your kid will do it too. Just wait."

     
  • At 4/16/2008 11:50 AM, OpenID cablegirl said…

    Have to agree with Sally HP here. He's not "that kid" he's just a kid.

    Silver lining? He's smart enough to figure this stuff out for himself. He's a born leader not a follower.

    Does that help at all? ;)

     
  • At 4/16/2008 5:13 PM, Blogger Jen of A2eatwrite said…

    I think all big bros are the instigators - isn't that their job?

     
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Friday, March 14, 2008

Pride, Pet Rocks, and Alex Elliot: Annoying Parent

Before I became a parent, I vowed that I would never be one of those obnoxious parents that would boast about their kids left and right. You know what that's like...you politely ask a mom (or dad) how her kid is doing and she gives you a list of the kid's top 50 achievements...in the four months that have passed since his birth. I would never ever do that!

Who am I kidding? I have yet to find a pre-parent declaration that I've kept. There may, and I stress may, possibly have been some blatant subtle bragging during the past five years. I do know one thing for sure though, I just have to take a moment here to talk about how impressed I am with my older son (OS). Yes, I know I am just like am one of those annoying parents. Come on though and cut me some slack! My most recent post was about how both my kids were playing in the toilet yesterday, not how they were finding the cure for cancer.

OS is really into ocean life. Some kids are really into trains, dinosaurs or pirates for example, and they can tell you every little detail about them. That's how OS is about marine life, in particular dolphins and whales. He can recognize many sea creatures, and even explain the differences between various types of dolphins and whales.

This morning when I dropped OS off at preschool, his teacher handed me a pet rock that he made in class. She told me that most of the kids chose to do bunnies, kittens, or puppies for their pet rocks. Not OS. He made a whale pet rock. It was the only whale pet rock in the class. After school I asked OS to tell me about his whale pet rock. First he specified that it was not just any pet rock, but was specifically a blue whale pet rock. I noticed two cotton balls on the rock. OS matter of factly told me that the two cotton balls were for the two flukes of the whale's tail. Six months ago, I didn't even know what a fluke was! OS actually ensured that his whale had them.

Yes, I know I know. I'm totally bragging here, but I was just so proud that he took an interest and carried it over into a school craft. Alright now I'm off to slink away. Did I mention that my kids bathed a cloth doll in the toilet yesterday?

Whale Pet RockPicture of Blue Whale


I still can't find my camera and had to rely on my cell phone.

A. Elliot's Lesson Learned: It is no fluke that I am proud of my children.

Labels: , ,

posted by Alex Elliot @ 6:50 PM   7 comments
7 Comments:
  • At 3/14/2008 8:14 PM, OpenID cablegirl said…

    I think it is spectacular that he has a subject abotu which he is so interested that he wants to share it with not only his family but his class as well.

    You totally get bragging rights on that. :)

     
  • At 3/14/2008 8:27 PM, OpenID pincushionpoints said…

    I think you should be proud of his pet whale. I work with Fish Biologists all day long, so I am particular to sea creatures myself. What a fine whale he made. :-)

     
  • At 3/14/2008 8:50 PM, Blogger Jen of A2eatwrite said…

    He's a darling pet rock whale! And passions are wonderful. If you ever get down to NYC, go to the Museum of Natural History and to the Hall of Oceans to see the Blue Whale there - it will rock his world. That's the best museum room in the universe, as far as I'm concerned. ;-)

     
  • At 3/14/2008 9:17 PM, Blogger Heather said…

    You should be proud! That's great that he knows that stuff. My kids haven't ever gotten that interested in anything to want to learn that much about it.

     
  • At 3/15/2008 8:08 AM, Blogger Wonderful World of Weiners said…

    That is the best damn blue whale rock I've ever seen! Ok, I havent seen many but this one ranks #1~~

    Hallie

     
  • At 3/15/2008 10:25 AM, Blogger Kami said…

    Okay, so is it wrong to admit that I haven't the foggiest what a fluke is?

    So, having said that, you have every right to brag about your little marine biologist!

    And the toilet bathing, he's just honing his oceanography skills.

    Tee hee!

     
  • At 3/16/2008 4:49 AM, Blogger Chantelle said…

    That is an awesome whale. Totally bragworthy.
    I have realized lately I have a horrible habit of actaully downplaying my baby's strengths among other mothers because I am trying to compensate for the fact that deep down I think my kid is so cool. That has to be a worse habit than actually bragging, doesn't it?

     
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Thursday, March 13, 2008

Today Went into the Toilet

Our dog Gandalf is not allowed to run in the yard by himself until he is healed from his surgery. Our vet also warned us that he would be "backed up" for a few days after the surgery. The Big Giraffe was happy to report Gandalf's first "delivery" yesterday, but we were not convinced that he was all clear. The Big Giraffe even did a couple extra laps around the yard with Gandalf this morning in the hopes that there would be more to follow. In the end, he gave up, leaving the boys (canine and human), the girls (feline only), and me to our Thursday routine.

Thursdays tend to be our days to catch up around the house. Fun times over at the Giraffe household! I started upstairs by cleaning the bathroom, even putting out a newly cleaned bathmat. Then I undertook the role of Sherlock Holmes in order to solve the mystery of my missing lap suit. I like to call the suit "Grimace" because with it's eggplant purple in color, so I feel like Grimace from McDonald's when I wear it. My suspects were two small boys who are constantly taking things out of my gym bag no matter where I hide it. I searched the house high and low for Grimace, but it was nowhere to be find. The boys were working on puzzles up in their room. I decided to go check in the basement to see if Grimace had been caught in the dirty laundry pile.

I wasn't down there for more than a few minutes. I remember hearing the toilet lid upstairs fall twice and calling up and asking my older son (OS) if everything was alright. He said it was, so I proceeded to make lunch for the boys. When I went upstairs and picked up my younger son (YS), his clothes felt slightly damp to me. I asked OS if he was playing in the sink. He said no. I had just washed my hands so I figured I must not have dried them all the way, and didn't think any further about YS's clothes. I should have.

After lunch we went upstairs for quiet time, and I saw a giant wet spot on OS's bed. I asked him the obvious question: did he have an accident. He said it was water. Oh, alright. What water? Water from the sink? Silly, mommy. Of course it wasn't water from the sink, he told me. Sigh of relief. It was water from the toilet! Trying not to lose it, I asked the obvious question in a strangled I'm trying not to yell at the top of my lungs voice. How did it get there? I figured they used a cup or their hands. It was worse than I thought. After careful cross-examination, I learned that they had bathed OS's cloth doll in the toilet. While I'm pretty sure that the toilet water was clean, OS did mention that he had also used the toilet.

I am baffled why they did this. We have a stool in the downstairs bathroom so that they can fill the sink and bathe their toys. OS does this at least once a day. There was also a stool in the bathroom sink upstairs that they could have used. OS is 4.5 and has been potty trained for a year. He knows what goes in a toilet.

Of course the worst was still yet to come. When asked, OS told me he didn't know what happened to the doll. I was in complete disbelief at this point. How hard is it to find a sopping wet doll? I was worried that she was buried under a couch cushion. We finally found her on the dining room bench. She had been sitting next to OS during lunch! Let's not dwell on that one too much or I may see my dinner again.

I confiscated the doll and we all went back upstairs to clean the bathroom. Yes, the one which I had just cleaned earlier that morning. It looked like a monsoon hit! Even the shower was wet with toilet water. The not yet used bathmat was sopping wet.

After bringing order to the chaos, I went back downstairs to try not to hyperventilate. That's when I got hit with the second surprise. Gandalf had apparently cleared the rest of his backlog...right in the middle of the hallway.

As for OS, I told him he wasn't allowed to use the upstairs bathroom for the rest of the day. It was soaked from both the monsoon and the post-monsoon clean-up. I believe he thought it was a punishment, which is not what I had intended. It actually had way more of an effect than taking away the dolls and other toilet bathing accoutrements that I found.

The Big Giraffe brought me home dinner.

A. Elliot's Lesson Learned: It never rains, but it pours...toilet water.

Labels: , ,

posted by Alex Elliot @ 7:35 PM   7 comments
7 Comments:
  • At 3/13/2008 9:50 PM, Blogger Heather said…

    Now THAT is a crappy day.

    Hope tomorrow is better for you!

     
  • At 3/13/2008 10:36 PM, OpenID cablegirl said…

    My god what a day!

    Big Giraffe gets big points for bringing your take out. lol

     
  • At 3/13/2008 10:44 PM, Blogger painted maypole said…

    ew

     
  • At 3/14/2008 6:42 AM, Blogger Ashley Winters said…

    What's that old saying, "When it rains, it pours!" Sounds like you got more than a little rain on this day.

     
  • At 3/14/2008 7:27 AM, Blogger Jen of A2eatwrite said…

    I have to admit... I don't miss those days. I just hope I'm a good grandma. I'm glad Big Giraffe brought you dinner!

     
  • At 3/14/2008 9:33 AM, Anonymous jane said…

    My OS puked and cried most of the day yesterday, and while it was awful for him to be ill, I'm glad I didn't have to clean toilet water from all over my house! Here's hoping your OS doesn't tell my OS about toilet bathing of toys or we'll have pirate playwear in the trash!

     
  • At 3/14/2008 12:41 PM, Blogger Lizzy in the Burbs said…

    Um,..well, I guess you can be relieved that they didn't attempt to flush the doll DOWN the toilet? (trying to look on the bright side :o) ) I almost thought you were going to say they had flushed your suit!

    Hope today is a better day! :)

    Lizzy

     
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Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Someone Please Give Me the Instruction Manual

Because we spend a lot time discussing the birds and the bees these days in our house, we had yet another sex conversation today. Except that today I seriously needed my parenting instruction manual that I just know that they must have forgotten to give me at the hospital...twice now. I even double checked under the couch, in the hall closet, in my husband's closet and any other place we stash things right before guests come over to our house. No luck. I checked on-line to see if perhaps the hospital had an electronic copy that I could download. No luck there. I really needed help on this one. I just know in that instruction manual that surely came with my baby there was a section explaining how to find the location of merfolk genitalia . Isn't it obvious? I mean that should be right after how to change the baby's diaper. I'm sure the writers would be able to foresee the following type of conversation that I had with my older son (OS) today:

OS: Mommy, Ariel is a girl!
Me: Yes, she is.
OS: That means she has a gina! (We're working on getting the "va" in there)
Me: Yes, she does.
OS: Where is it?
Me: (Feeling under pressure here as I know nothing about the gentalia of merfolk because apparently my anatomy pre-med course I took left that one out). I'm not sure...(based on numerous parenting articles saying it's fine to admit you don't know as well as a personal stall tactic for me), but I think it would be on the back of her tail.
OS: That's right! It's just like the cats' ginas!
Me: That's right. (Eyes darting back and forth performing a catscan to make sure unsuspecting cats were in a safe location before any "veterinary examinations" occured.)
OS: I like cookies in preschool.

A. Elliot's Lesson Learned: Pre-med anatomy may not be sufficient for answering preschoolers' anatomy questions.

Labels: , ,

posted by Alex Elliot @ 8:21 PM   13 comments
13 Comments:
  • At 2/19/2008 9:30 PM, OpenID cablegirl said…

    Bwahahahaha! Literal tears running down my face laughing about that conversation.

     
  • At 2/19/2008 9:34 PM, Blogger Jodi said…

    I had an equally weird conversation with Michael today about how I have breasts and can he touch them? I just didn't know what the right answer was.

     
  • At 2/19/2008 9:52 PM, Blogger Kami said…

    Okay, I had to google merfolk. Am I the only one?

    Okay then.

    Yikes hey! This parenting without the manual is scary stuff.

     
  • At 2/19/2008 11:36 PM, Blogger Heather said…

    I never thought of that before. What an excellent question!

     
  • At 2/20/2008 11:14 AM, Blogger Lizzy in the Burbs said…

    You are too funny! Kami, don't feel bad, I didn't catch on to the "merfolk" thing right away, either. I thought perhaps Ariele was a friend from school! LOL

    Just wait, Alex! The questions get much more interesting as they get older! (I don't want to tell you too much, it would scare the begeebers out of ya!) :0 If only there was such a manual, being a parent would be soooo much easier!

    Lizzy

     
  • At 2/20/2008 11:16 AM, Anonymous Suzanne said…

    I like cookies, too. Excellent how he can move from one topic to another with such ease.

    If you do ever learn about the genitalia of merfolk, let me know if they have pubic hair. I was never curious about that until now, but since you brought up the topic, it strikes me as interesting. Scales and hair seem sort of messy.

     
  • At 2/20/2008 7:38 PM, Blogger Chicky Chicky Baby said…

    I feel you. I had a five minute conversation about why one of my dogs has a penis and the other one doesn't. Good times.

     
  • At 2/21/2008 2:08 AM, Blogger Lady M said…

    Did you see Liz's post at Mom-101 today? She went to a toy show, and there were a series of anatomically correct multi-cultural dolls. Maybe they need to add merfolk!

     
  • At 2/21/2008 5:34 AM, Blogger Chantelle said…

    I think the last line of that conversation about summed up the attention span of a preschooler. For you, sex is a tricky topic. For him, it is about as noteworthy as cookies. It's too funny.

     
  • At 2/21/2008 1:07 PM, Blogger skiplovey said…

    Oh lord help me when we get to that phase. Uggh. I love that cookies are far more interesting to him though.

     
  • At 2/22/2008 10:57 AM, Anonymous Jane said…

    Interesting.. I had a conversation like that yesterday. My OS said Mom, you have a vagina, right? And you sit to pee, and I have a penis, and boys stand. I said that some boys sit to pee, and that's ok too. Then he said that he was going to "wrap a vagina around" his penis... so he could sit to pee? I don't know... I was truly flabbergasted. I said that he couldn't really do that, boys just have penises and girls have vaginas, and people don't have both. Merfolk on the other hand, just may!

     
  • At 2/24/2008 8:11 AM, Blogger soccer mom in denial said…

    Last week during his shower, one of my little men asked what was behind his p*nis. That led to the big conversation.

     
  • At 2/25/2008 11:40 AM, Blogger Magpie said…

    Hmm...Ariel has a vagina?

     
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Monday, February 18, 2008

Where's My Instruction Manual?

In case none of you have noticed, parenting is really hard work. I'm not talking about the whining, the temper tantrums, the dirty diapers or throwing up (you or them). I'm also not talking about the mounds of clothes, the meals, or the cleaning. I'm talking about the emotional aspects.

It's always been important to me that my boys are exposed to both so called boy toys as well as so called girl toys. In fact, if there's fighting going on between my boys, I can almost guarantee that it's over a My Little Pony or a Groovy Girl. My boys love playing with them, although I have to admit that they play differently with these alleged girl toys than I did with my ponies and dolls. For instance, the latest thing has been to put the ponies on our big Lightening McQueen car and let them go for an out of control joy ride throughout the kitchen. This usually seems to occur when I'm trying to cook dinner. The ponies also enjoy taking swim lessons and baths in the bathroom sink. However, the more traditional routines that I used to enjoy such as feeding the dolls, changing their clothes, and putting them to bed don't seem to be part of their play. In fact the dolls are almost always naked. (It's not a big deal; Groovy Girls are not anatomically correct.)

We've co-existed nicely with these allegedly female toys. Fairly recently though, my older son (OS) has gotten into Disney Princesses. No, he hasn't gotten into watching the movies because the only princess movie that he has seen is The Little Mermaid which despite owning, he never wants to watch. I believe his princess interest began when a friend had a princess birthday cake. She's very into princesses. As a result, he picked a princess birthday cake for me. Now both of my boys love playing with the princess figurines that came on my cake. Fortunately those figurines stay at home, or at least they are supposed to.

Last week, the boys and I went to a daytime moms group meeting. While I was taking off my younger son's (YS) coat and boots, OS apparently went into the living room and announced to a couple of moms that he was made from his daddy's sperm and his mommy's egg. He proceeded to tell them that he grew in my uterus, then the doctor cut a hole in it and pulled him out, and then he was born. Of course I found this out about an hour later. The mom who told me about it complimented OS on his precociousness. I felt a sense of pride. OS is down with the birds and the bees.

I am embarrassed to admit I was thrown for a loop, when OS whipped the princess dolls out of his pants pocket. He then offered a lengthy description of each princess. Once we all got home, I reminded OS that we don't bring our toys into other people's houses because we risk losing them. OS kept talking about how he wanted to take the princesses to preschool. Finally, in a moment of not so great judgment, I told him he couldn't because his friends might tease him. As soon as I said it, I wanted to clamp my hand over my mouth. I don't want my son to think that I think there's something wrong with his interests. I don't want him to think that he can't talk to me about his interests. Most importantly, I don't want him to think there's something wrong with his interests. At the same time, there was a part of me that felt that potential teasing is just as real as the birds and the bees.

Today the Big Giraffe was halfway out the door when OS called to him to come back. BG had a little McDonald's teddy bear from our Chicago trip in the outside mesh pocket of his backpack. OS told BG that he needed to leave the bear at home so that his friends wouldn't tease him at work. I'm not exaggerating (by much) when I say that I felt like my heart stopped. I certainly did feel like the world's worst mother. The Big Giraffe looked horrified. Even YS looked concerned. I had to fight back tears as I explained to OS that it was important that he have the interests that he wanted and that he didn't have to pretend to be someone that he wasn't. I would always love him no matter what. Except that he's 4 so there's no way he could comprehend even a fraction of what I said. It's just like anything else where my kids remember something really random, like that I raised a caterpillar in second grade, and then something I don't want them to remember like saying their friends will tease them. I spent the rest of the day being overly interested in discussing princesses. I think even OS thought it was a bit much. Where's my instruction manual?

A. Elliot's Lesson Learned: Little pitchers have bigs ears...and big memories...and big mouths.

Labels: ,

posted by Alex Elliot @ 8:04 PM   11 comments
11 Comments:
  • At 2/18/2008 9:44 PM, OpenID cablegirl said…

    What a tough situation! Don't beat your self up over it. I'm sure you will be able to rectify it. OS sounds like he's quite a self assured child. You've obviously done a fantastic job so far.

     
  • At 2/18/2008 9:52 PM, Blogger Jodi said…

    We all have done that, said something we knew we shouldn't and then the kids repeat it.

    I love your non-discriminatory toy policy.

     
  • At 2/18/2008 10:56 PM, Blogger Count Mockula said…

    You're doing such a great job, really. I know where you're coming from, but this is fine...

     
  • At 2/18/2008 11:28 PM, Blogger Ted & Laura said…

    Marvey is 2.5ish. He is male. He wears princess pull ups. He thinks they are the coolest thing ever.

    We have the same toy policy, but got off easy toywise having had one boy and one girl.

    Oh and I can't even imagine the things my children will repeat/take to heart/remember for ever and ever...

     
  • At 2/19/2008 9:02 AM, Blogger Whirlwind said…

    If it makes you feel better, my girls play the same way with their My Little Ponies. Often times, the ponies are ridden by their Star Wars or Super Hero Figures.

    We have a no bringing toys to school policy because I have spent many night searching for a lost toy while the child sobs. We've found everything, but it's usually an item that gets left in the van or stuffed into the bottom of a backpack and forgotten for a bit.

     
  • At 2/19/2008 9:18 AM, Blogger Heather said…

    I've been there, not the exact same thing, but similar. It stinks. I often wish I had a rewind button. But the kids are fine, they get over it. Nothing a little therapy won't help. Gah!

     
  • At 2/19/2008 11:38 AM, Blogger Chantelle said…

    Oh, bless your heart, that is so hard! I keep thinking about how I am gonna deal with these things as my little one gets older, but it is obvious to me already how complicated it is. I think you are doing a really great job negotiating the desire to make them open minded while still being aware of social norms and what people think. That is really all you can do.

     
  • At 2/19/2008 3:18 PM, Blogger Worker Mommy said…

    I am very impressed by OS's knowledge of pregnancy and birth!

    This parenting thing is kinda hard isn't it.
    I have probably said something similiar to my son and of course regretted it too. Parenting by trial and error, right ?

     
  • At 2/19/2008 5:22 PM, Blogger Scribbit said…

    I shouldn't find this funny but it was cute the image of him pulling it out of his little pocket. I've found that older siblings make a big difference on what toys my children play with. My oldest girl liked dolls well enough but by the time my youngest came around and wanted to be just like her big brothers she was into cars and all sorts of boy things.

     
  • At 2/19/2008 6:30 PM, Anonymous Suzanne said…

    Don't lose too much sleep over it. It'll be fine.

     
  • At 2/20/2008 7:26 AM, Blogger Sally HP said…

    You do such a great job of allowing them to be who they want. I think that, although you feel bad about it, there does come a point when the whole teasing issue will have to be discussed...doesn't mean you're going to feel good about it :( Don't worry about,I'm sure that it made a much larger impact on you than him!

     
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Sunday, February 10, 2008

Library Rules

Just to clarify, this post is meant to be humorous. I think humor is an important part of parenting, and I really enjoy that part (and many other parts).

When my older son (OS) was born, I couldn't wait to begin experiencing life with him. I pictured the snuggling we would do, the walks that we would take, the songs that we would sing, and the trips to the library. Together we would curl up on a big comfy chair in the library and read our books in front of the fireplace while I sipped from a cup of hot chocolate. Alright maybe not that last part; obviously it needs to be cold hot chocolate. However, the reality has never come close to that picture. Between the fact that the librarians tend not to be very helpful, the lack of any available fireplace, and the prohibition on food or drink, even hot chocolate (can you believe it!), I don't spend much time there. Of course, I don't think I am their favorite customer either. Whenever I casually inquire as to whether any of the money that they are collecting to build some huge addition will go toward placing a book drop box in the parking lot, they quickly change the subject.

Still, it did bother me that I wasn't taking my boys to the library as often as I should. I loved the library as a child and I want my boys to feel comfortable there. I also hope they discover at an early age that they can find a book to answer their questions in addition to learning how to borrow someone else's property and be responsible for it.

So earlier this week when OS started talking about the Curious George book in which he visits the library, it reminded me that the Big Giraffe had led his own library excursion with the boys over the holidays, and I had not remembered a follow-up trip to return the borrowed books. I had a pretty good bad feeling that those books were overdue. Nice way for us to teach responsibility, right? Since they were on his card, I couldn't look them up on-line to see the due date.

After scrabbling around the house to find the books, the boys and I headed out to the library. I have long since given up on the fireplace and the hot chocolate, but my head was filled with cozy images of the three of us curled up with a book. I am confident that the boys' heads were filled with fun images of the one eyed goldfish at the library that they just love. (No,
I'm not making that part up I swear.)
Before entering the library, I had gone over a list of rules with my boys. Talk quietly, no hitting, no shoving and they needed to listen to me. (As opposed to the in-house rules...) OS pointed out that Daddy had already talked to him about talking quietly when they were there a few weeks ago. Great!

It turns out that the books were not overdue, since we had renewed them on-line at their original due date. We returned them anyway and went down to the dungeon children's room to select more books. A librarian helped OS find a book on how rainbows are made. The three of us (not the librarian) curled up and read the book. Wow, I had attained my goals of making the library a nice place of the boys, showing OS how he could find the answer to his questions, and enjoying some nice snuggle time together.

I must have pushed it too far...about ten minutes too far. Suddenly the boys started chasing each other around the library through the stacks. That's when I identified the problem with having little kids at the library: parents are also bound by the whisper requirement! In other words, no yelling. Not that I would ever do that anyway. My kids were running through the stacks, and I was trying to grab at them while whispering furiously. Of course, they paid no attention to me. Later OS informed me that "not running" was not one of the rules that I had laid out. I pointed out that it fell under "listening to me". Of course, he technically didn't violate that rule either, since he was running too fast to hear me whisper. That is why it will be a good ten years two weeks before I take my kids to the library again. After all, the books are due in two weeks.

A. Elliot's Lesson Learned: Most places that require children to be quiet also require parents to be quiet.

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posted by Alex Elliot @ 7:55 PM   12 comments
12 Comments:
  • At 2/10/2008 10:24 PM, Blogger Mayberry said…

    At our library the children's area is open to the floor above ... which is of course the adult area. I have yet to figure out how I am supposed to keep my kids' voices from carrying up there.

     
  • At 2/10/2008 10:30 PM, Blogger Midwest said…

    Yeah. It's really a crapshoot on whether my kids will behave or not at the library.

    Our library lets us keep books for about a month though.

     
  • At 2/10/2008 10:35 PM, Blogger Heather said…

    Oops. Posted under the wrong email before...that's supposed to be me instead of "midwest."

     
  • At 2/11/2008 1:14 AM, Blogger Lizzy in the Burbs said…

    I remember those days when my boys were little, fun but a little tense at moments! I think all librarians are a bit uptight, must be a job requirement! :) Don't worry, it will get better! (then you just have to tackle them wanting to check out 20 books, 10 DVD's, and 5 magazines all at once!)

    Lizzy

     
  • At 2/11/2008 9:47 AM, Blogger Count Mockula said…

    Have you ever seen the Doris Day movie "Please, don't eat the daisies"? My favorite part is when one of her kids eats like a dozen daisies and she asks him why and he says "You never told me not to!"

     
  • At 2/11/2008 11:03 AM, Blogger Whirlwind said…

    The library I used to take the girls to for storytime had a slide, kitchen set and full toy area. Try keeping kids quiet in a setting like that!

    Unfortunately, we don't visit the library as often as we should.

     
  • At 2/11/2008 11:46 AM, Blogger Amy said…

    My problem at the library is that my kid goes straight for the computer games and I can barely drag him off to find books!

     
  • At 2/11/2008 1:13 PM, Blogger skiplovey said…

    Ah I see the fireplace has resurfaced in the "visions of happiness" again. Always the fireplace huh?
    My memories of the library from childhood included my parents dropping my sister and I off in the kids room while my dad disappeared towards the magazines. I have no idea how ill behaved we were. At least you were there to keep them in check.

     
  • At 2/11/2008 3:03 PM, Blogger Jennifer, Le Binky Bitch said…

    I had the exact same fantasies about the library. Turns out, librarians are rude (well not ALL librarians) and it's just not fun to take kids to the library for any length of time.

     
  • At 2/11/2008 5:12 PM, Blogger Jen of A2eatwrite said…

    Our library seems to eschew books for just about every other bell and whistle that's out there - I find it very frustrating finding books at times.

     
  • At 2/13/2008 2:26 AM, Blogger Suzanne said…

    In defense of lib