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Sunday, March 15, 2009

The Socks From Hell

This past week was emotionally challenging for me. With the economy being the way it is and so many people being out of jobs, it's hard to complain too much. However, several months ago someone who has always been very important to me walked out of my life for reasons I don't understand. I've been struggling with it. I made what I thought was a really good effort towards communication, but I realized this past week that it unfortunately didn't work. I thought that I hid my disappointment pretty well.

As much as I hate it when the Big Giraffe is out of town, the week was pretty much smooth sailing despite his absence. The kids and I got along great. I truly enjoyed being around them. I got everything done that I needed to do, and I even baked chocolate chip cookies from scratch with my sons and a friend of theirs on Friday. More impressively, I completely cleaned up the kitchen immediately afterward. I was on top of the laundry, dinner and my triathlon training schedule. I was good to go. Or so I liked to pretend anyhow.

Until last night that is. I was talking to my triathlon training buddy on the phone and the Big Giraffe asked if I was going to get a pedicure with her. I was caught off guard. Um..no. I explained that we were trying to set plans to go running today. After I got off the phone, the Big Giraffe told me that he thought I should get a pedicure. Pedicures are usually reserved for special occasions (Christmas and Mother's Day) and maybe one during the beginning of summer to celebrate sandal season. I asked the Big Giraffe to elaborate and he simply said that he thought it would be a good idea. Were my feet that bad? Did I have claws for toenails?

Confused, I sat down to continue my current knitting project, which was a sock on two sets of circular needles. I had had problems at the beginning of the socks, then an interval of smooth sailing, then more problems. I had in fact gone to a knitting help drop-in at the local yarn store. I thought I was good to go again and so when I realized I was stuck...well let's just say it probably was like being in an NC-17 movie - the vocabulary was that good. To my horror I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. I decided to take a break.

Afterward, I went back more determined than ever to master my sock. I had already finished the the heel flap and turned the heel. I was almost done with it. The Big Giraffe expressed snide surprise that I was continuing to work on Satan's Servant. I had no idea what he meant. He then laughed and said he was talking about my sock. I was offended. My sock was wonderful! Alright maybe it looked like a leg warmer...for an elephant...or a bad 80's slouch sock since I had somehow picked up too many stitches for about a dozen rows. This resulted in a bulge around the leg of the sock. Since I am knitting one sock at a time, even though I am likely to slip up and create a bulge in the mate of Satan's Servant, that bulge is unlikley to match the location of the original bulge. I had dedicated time and effort to this sock. Where there were dropped stiches, I used a crotchet hook to pick them back up. When I knitted on the wrong needles, causing the circular needles to pop out, I rethreaded them. I had practicually shed tears over this sock. Knitting this sock was relaxing damn it!

Before I started knitting, I read the book The Friday Night Knitting Club. It included several metaphors comparing knitting to life. In particular, the book suggested that the way you deal with your knitting is a reflection of how you deal with your life. For example, are you patient when you drop a whole row of stitches or do you drop the F bomb? This post may help you guess the level of poise I was able to apply when I dropped stitches on this sock. I realized that even though I had thought I hid my disappointment so well from everyone over the past week, I had truly only hidden it from myself. I put all my frustration and disappointment into my sock, and I just kept at it longer after it became fun. Now, do I think it's alright that I did that? Absolutely! Better a sock than a whole packages of Oreos.

The Big Giraffe cautiously stated that he suggested a pedicure because I seemed pretty upset this week and he thought it was be a nice way of relaxing. What a sweetie! I took him up on it today, and it was great. As for my sock? Yeah, there are a lot of similarities between knitting and life. Do you go back and fix your mistakes? When you're stuck do you ask for help? However, when all is said and done, it's just an analogy. Hey, we're talking about a sock here! Unlike real life, you can rip out your entire knit sock and start completely from scratch again. This time, I picked a pattern that would allow me to work on two socks at a time on double circular needles. Better yet, the instructions include step by step glossy photos. It's already going so much better. Even if I make mistakes and end up with a bad 80's slouch sock, its mate should match since they are both being knit at the same time.

A. Elliot's Lesson Learned: One elephant sock may be useless, but two form a pair.

posted by Alex Elliot @ 9:40 PM 3 comments

3 Comments:

At 3/16/2009 8:50 AM, Heather said…

Aw, that husband of yours is a sweetie.
At 3/16/2009 3:49 PM, Kami said…

What a great husband! I have noticed that I do this too, although not with my knitting since I haven't picked up a pair of needles in years, but transfer my frustration or anger onto something else.

Glad you enjoyed your well deserved pedicure.
At 3/18/2009 12:01 AM, Suzanne said…

Great post. I am glad that you were able to vent your frustration into the sock versus other things. That is very healthy, and a good metaphor to boot. Heh heh. Seriously, though, keep your chin up and call me if you need to talk.

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Name:	Alex Elliot
Home:	MA, United States
About Me:	Professional Mom of two cats, a dog, an ant farm, and oh yeah...two boys: a 6 year old and a 3 year old. Also found in my house is my husband who is known on this blog as The Big Giraffe.
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