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Sunday, March 22, 2009

My $250 Library Book

I know that I been absent from the blogosphere for the last couple weeks. Don't you just hate the way real life gets in the way of blog reading? I'm kidding! Well, sort of any way. The past few days have gone well other than the fact that I have yet another cold. I think it's a combination of the fact that I had insomina even before the Big Giraffe was out of town, so I ended up unable to really sleep for about a week.

So, what has gone well? First, the Big Giraffe has been working tirelessly on getting our younger son (YS) to put the "r" on the end of the words like "car." The result is that YS thinks that Daddy is a lunatic and that it's great fun to ask Daddy questions about Mommy's "cah."

I also found our missing library book! Our older son (OS) is very into the solar system and the weather. As such, the Big Giraffe checked out two books on lightening for him (on my library card I might add). Although I liked one of the lightening books and all of the books about outer space, I was looking forward to returning the other lightening book...which of course had to be the one OS liked best. It provided a wide array of gory details about death and lightening. These are the parts of the book that require quick improv when you realize that in your absent-minded droning, you have just recounted tales of lightening chasing down entire families to strike them over and over again until they are all gone. Hmm...perhaps the sections weren't that bad, but they certainly detailed large number of deaths and warned us that it is quite likely that lightening will strike the same place repeatedly so you should never go back to the spot where lightening has struck before like your own backyard where your tree was struck last March. Do these authors have any idea how important it is to me to get my kids out playing in my backyard? It saves my sanity! I don't typically send them out in dangerous storms.

We had already renewed the library books once, so of course the final due date coincided with my week of insomnia/ I found all of the books that I had enjoyed, but I couldn't find the apocalyptic massacre storm book anywhere. It was neither with the other library books nor with the kids' regular books. I know because I culled through the entire bookcase looking for it. I figured that an extra day or two to find this book was well worth the 30 cents. I moved the couches and took out all the cushions. No luck. I even pulled the mattresses up from the boys' beds to see if the book had fallen there. Nothing. As long as the mattresses were up, I thought I would look to see if it had fallen under either headboard, since the headboards are bookcases. I looked under YS's bookcase without a problem. Then I got to OS's. Somehow my knee must have just hit at the right angle because the next thing I knew my knee had gone through the bunky board.

How on earth could fit into the category of things going well? For three reasons. First, denial. Second, as I proudly recounted during my parenting class later that evening, not a swear word escaped my mouth. Third, I was entertained by a similar story shared at the same parent group by someone named Balex Melliot, except that Balex told the group that her knee had gone through her kid's boogie board. Embarrassing for her to say that, but funny and entertaining for everyone who got to hear the story. One would have expected someone in the parent group to correct me Balex, but obviously they either truly believed she was nuts enough to let her kids sleep on a boogie board or assumed that they misheard "bunky" as "boogie" due to her cool Chicago accent.

The library told me that I had the option of either paying to replace the book, buying a new copy from Amazon.com, or filing a claim. The claim would unfortunately remain on my permanent record. I vaguely remember being threatened with stains to my permanent record in junior high school, but since I am not school right now, I don't know where they intend to write it. I was more affected by the sob story about budget cuts zeroing out the library's acquisition budget, so that they will buy no future books. Thus my loss would prevent any future residents of my town from ever learning about lightening. I went on-line seeking a used copy since the a new one was about $50. Between the bunky board and the book replacement, this library book was costing about $250! Do you know how many books on lightening I could have bought my kids?

Fortunately, I found the book in a suitcase (for when we go to Chicago this summer, Mommy) and now I'm only out about $200, which is better than being out 250.

A. Elliot's Lesson Learned: Bunky boards are for sleeping, and boogie boards are for surfing.

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Name:Alex Elliot
Home:MA, United States
About Me:Professional Mom of two cats, a dog, an ant farm, and oh yeah...two boys: a 6 year old and a 3 year old. Also found in my house is my husband who is known on this blog as The Big Giraffe.
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For those of us who didn't get an instruction manual with our babies and for whom parenting hasn't always gone as planned. On a more serious note this blog is about supporting a woman's ability to make her own choices about parenting including the choice, for whatever reason, to bottle feed her babies formula.

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