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Tuesday, January 06, 2009

Getting Ready

I have been very stressed by my younger son's (YS) upcoming surgery. I wrote a post at GNMParents last Friday about how Parenting When Family is Far Away compounds this sort of stress. Today my younger son (YS) had his pre-op appointment at the hospital. Apparently I'm either getting old, losing my mind (hey I'll be 33 on Saturday), or perhaps a combination of both because I have no recollection of having a pre-op appointment before my breast reduction surgery. Or maybe it's just that it wasn't required.

I had never been to this hospital before, but I knew where it was because of a very important landmark: the drive-thru Starbucks. The ENT must be a fellow coffee lover because he appeared to be on the same wavelength. When I mentioned knowing the location of the hospital because of the Starbucks, he commented how much he likes the drive-thru aspect!

YS and I arrived, and I was immediately impressed with the hospital. It was bright and clean and, oddly enough, cheerful. They had a lot of nice plants in the atrium. YS was seen promptly for his appointment. It was one long appointment. It lasted over an hour, and the nurse and nurse practioner who saw him were very thorough. They asked me all the usual medical history questions and then basically went over YS with a fine tooth comb. One nurse has been doing this for 25 years and gave me very detailed information on what to expect with both the surgery and recovery. Sheeven gave me a little schedule to follow (cafeteria for breakfast, coffee stand, then waiting room) to follow during the surgery to make the time fly. Is it possible that she knew me in a former life? Or maybe my house is bugged, because I had been worried about the slow tick of the clock during the surgery.

The good news is that both she and the nurse separately told me that YS was so calm during the physical that they really thought that he would have an easy recovery. Their reasoning was that a lot of times just being around doctors and nurses is traumatic for kids, never mind the surgery, so since YS was totally fine with being poked and prodded they felt he was one step ahead of the game. Whether it's true or not, I felt an immediate sense of relief. So much so that my MIL commented on how much more relaxed I looked when I walked into the house after the appointment. There is definitely an emotional benefit to parents from the pre-op appointment. I left feeling reassured. I not only knew that the hospital was near the Starbucks, but I knew where to park, where to go when we first arrived at the hospital on Friday, and what to expect during the recovery. Instead of waiting for the discharge from the hospital, they gave me the handouts including the food list and post-op treatment today.

Everything seemed to be going smoothly until I got home and remembered that my older son (OS) seems to have gone straight from age 5 to age 15 this week. How did I remember? Well, for the third day in a row, he told me that he hates me and that I'm the worst mother in the entire world. I am sure he will be far happier with my parenting this weekend when his brother is getting all of the attention. Wait wait wait! Before you take his side, not only has my MIL extended her visit so that he has has a grandma staying through YS's recovery, but I've arranged some special playdates as well as some alone time with him for later on in the recovery.

A. Elliot's Lesson Learned: A calm child, cheerful hospital, experienced medical staff with good bedside manner, a visiting relative, and a nearby Starbucks can help a parent of a pre-op child manage stress.

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Name:Alex Elliot
Home:MA, United States
About Me:Professional Mom of two cats, a dog, an ant farm, and oh yeah...two boys: a 6 year old and a 3 year old. Also found in my house is my husband who is known on this blog as The Big Giraffe.
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For those of us who didn't get an instruction manual with our babies and for whom parenting hasn't always gone as planned. On a more serious note this blog is about supporting a woman's ability to make her own choices about parenting including the choice, for whatever reason, to bottle feed her babies formula.

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