1. It's a great idea to practice riding your bike in a flat and empty location, like a high school parking lot during a weekend
2. It's a great idea to practice riding your bike in a place that has constant police patrols, like a high school parking lot during a weekend, so that if you fall off your bike and break a limb or render yourself unconscious, you'll probably be found pretty quickly
3. If you are going to practice riding a bike in a place with easily amused teenagers, like a high school parking lot, even during a weekend, you need to be prepared to ignore people laughing at you
4. Check out how to use your brakes while standing still, preferably off your bike, particularly if you haven't ridden a bike for so long that you have forgotten that the brakes are on the lower bars, and thus riding with your hands on the handle bar may leave you unprepared to use the brakes when you need them
5. The people who warn you that you are most likely to fall off your bike when either going 1 mile per hour or standing still with one foot clipped into a pedal are absolutely correct
6. If you have one foot clipped into a pedal when you test holding onto the lower handle bars so you can reach the brakes, you increase your chances of proving correct those who warn that you are most likely to fall off your bike when either going 1 mile per hour or standing still with one foot clipped into a pedal
7. Wearing jeans to test-drive a bike will leave you without the extra padding for your crotch provided by biking shorts that would otherwise be very helpful when you fall while standing still with one foot clipped into a pedal to test your brakes
8. Fear, such as fear of breaking a limb from falling, may be a good motivator, but it does not burn extra calories
9. If you survive the first ten minutes and get used to biking again, you will have so much fun riding around the parking lot that without realizing it, the 30 minutes you told your husband you would be gone has suddenly turned into an hour
10. If your husband is upset that you are out biking twice as long as you promised (which I did not experience today), remind him that you let him sleep in this morning
11. If your husband was worried that you were gone for twice as long as you promised (which I did not experience today), encourage him to read your blog with specific focus on lesson #2
12. If your husband did not notice that you were gone for twice as long as you promised (which did appear to happen) and you blog about it, hope he doesn't read your blog

Labels: Exercise and Fitness, Humor (at least Attempted)