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Wednesday, November 14, 2007

So I Have to Say I Love It in a Blog

Last night I gave my presentation on blogging. I never really realized how big a topic blogging was until I needed to try and cram it into an hour and a half informal talk. Being the geek that I am, I put together a PowerPoint presentation. I even had a slide about why people blog. I planned to speak about why I like blogging. And I did...sort of, but not really. I mean I practiced what I was going to say, but when the time came, I started to lose steam on that subject. I think I did okay on the factual parts of the talk, where I covered subjects like types of blogs, comments, security, and choosing a blogging tool. When it came to making it personal, however, I struggled with my own emotions.

To completely distort the lyrics from the old Jim Croce song...
Ev'ry time I tried to say it, the words just came out wrong.
So I'll have to say why I write...in my blog.

I started blogging because I was passionate about talking about how isolated my need to bottle feed my babies made me feel. I was frustrated with the lack of information about how to do it. I knew all along though that I didn't want to solely talk about formula. I also wanted to talk about all the other "formula-like" experiences that I had or lessons learned that I wish someone else had told me. Hence the "flexible parenting" part of my blog name.

My first year as a SAHM was really hard for me. I felt very conflicted about vet school and motherhood. In all honesty, a lot of times I still do. Added on top of that was the feeling that I lacked a certain motherhood gene that everyone else seemed to possess. I didn't instinctively know what cute little songs to sing, how to soothe a baby or quite frankly how to navigate the landscape of baby classes and playdates. Sometimes I would feel overwhelmed. Sometimes I felt amused. Many times I was both overwhelmed and amused. It still cracks me up that we had to sing songs as part of a lap-sit storystelling class at the library. Song singing never occurred to me when I signed up for the class. My ears will forever ring with the sound of wounded animals my pathetic singing attempts whenever I go into my public library.

One of my biggest struggles, was that I often felt like I didn't know what I was doing. Truth be told, I still feel like that a lot. In all honesty I'm sure many of my friends in real life also don't always feel like they know what they're doing either. However, knowing, just off the top of my head, that there are others like me who have also found string cheese in their son's bed and had to also convince their child not to eat it, makes me feel immensely better. I can't say that's something that I would bring up in an everyday conversation. At least not without a glass of wine or a good piece of chocolate cake (which despite my wishes is not an everyday experience). What blogging did though was it allowed me to see that I wasn't the only one who felt like that. It took away the competition that I put on myself in my every day life. I feel like through blogging I have met other moms who are like me and other people who aren't parents or who aren't like me whatsoever but who make me laugh, have viewpoints that I find intriguing, or have life experiences that fascinate me.

Mostly though in terms of my own personal writing, I think it has made me a little saner. It has allowed me to reflect on how I really feel about things. I tend to be a somewhat private person when it comes to expressing feelings. Honestly, I don't think most of my blog posts are very emotionally revealing. However, when I sit down to type a post, I do spend time reflecting on what I'm going to write, even when the subject is silly or ridiculous like my husband's car getting egged or crazy schemes to be a millionaire. (Okay, Big Giraffe, I am not saying that the egg on your car was a big joke.) It forces me to take a little "me time" where as cheesy as it sounds, I get to check in with myself.

A. Elliot's Lesson Learned: If you can't express the sentiment out loud, write it in your blog.

Labels: , ,

posted by Alex Elliot @ 9:15 PM   6 comments
6 Comments:

  • At 11/14/2007 11:36 PM, Blogger super des said…

    I'm glad you blog, and I love your reasoning. I also loved the lesson learned today, and I think I'll stick to that myself.

     

  • At 11/15/2007 9:10 AM, Blogger Suzanne said…

    Don't worry about finding string cheese in your kid's bed and needing to convince him not to eat it. It's far worse in our household, where I'll find Teddy Grahams or other yummies on the floor (or in bed) and my husband has to convince me not to eat it. If your son turns out like me, eating crumbs from the floor at the age of 31, then you can worry. :)

     

  • At 11/15/2007 10:15 AM, Anonymous Selfmademom said…

    I don't think what you said is "cheesy" at all! You have to do what keeps you sane...

     

  • At 11/15/2007 12:53 PM, Blogger Heather said…

    I totally agree. It's so much easier to write for me than it is to talk...

     

  • At 11/15/2007 2:18 PM, Blogger Haidee said…

    I planned my pregnancies, so in theory, I planned my children. Of course you don't control who they turn out to be, so I am not sure I can truly call them "planned." I don't think my version of planned would have included opening all the cabinets with the china in them and banging the doors and biting the brother and not napping and tipping the chairs over and dragging them all over the kitchen all day long... but I digress.
    I am a mommy who sings lots of songs NOW, but let me tell you, when my first was three days, weeks, months old, I just sang The Wheels On The Bus and added anything I could think of, including cows and squeaking brakes and I don't know what else. And I think if anyone thinks I do the mommy thing easily and without doubts and worries, and having no clue how to do most of it, I am acting a lot better than I think I am!
    I think expressing it all in a blog is a great way to get it out there.

     

  • At 11/15/2007 2:22 PM, Blogger Kami said…

    I find that I can express myself much better in a blog post than I can verbally.

    Yay for blogging!

    Oh and I SO don't have a clue about this motherhood thing, I am flying by the seat of me pants. I've had a few crashes and I am postive there will be more but the ride, well, it's been pretty sweet so far.

    ;-)

     
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Name:Alex Elliot
Home:MA, United States
About Me:Professional Mom of two cats, a dog, an ant farm, and oh yeah...two boys: a 6 year old and a 3 year old. Also found in my house is my husband who is known on this blog as The Big Giraffe.
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For those of us who didn't get an instruction manual with our babies and for whom parenting hasn't always gone as planned. On a more serious note this blog is about supporting a woman's ability to make her own choices about parenting including the choice, for whatever reason, to bottle feed her babies formula.

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