I think that women have a hard time saying what they like about themselves. We don't want to come off as sounding conceited or high on ourselves. In fact I would even go say far as to say that asking many woman what they like about themselves make them feel uncomfortable. In our society it's acceptable to make fun of ourselves and to list our faults, but it doesn't seem okay to articulate the qualities that we have that we love. I know it is quite a feet sometimes to think positively about myself.
It is therefore no surprise that when I look at my two sons, I can immediately think of several of my qualities that I do not want them to have. They range from acne in junior high to the way I sometimes feel like a heel when I struggle to manage stress; there's a lot of room for improvement. Yet, when I look at my husband, I can immediately start listing qualities that I hope my boys inherit from him. One thing he does that I love is that he shows a lot of soul in the way he treats everyone with consideration and respect. For example, he always inquires how cashiers, waiters, etc. are doing. If someone does a good job, not only does he compliment that person, but he also goes directly up to that person's manager and tells them how impressed he is by that particular employee. I hope my boys will be like that.
After dabbling my toes into the pool of positive reflection, I was able to think about some of the qualities that I do hope my boys inherit from me. First, I hope they inherit my love for animals. I also hope that they inherit my sense of humor, both because of the way I can have fun in almost any situation and the way that I can use humor to defuse the tension or stress of others (as well as myself). I hope that inherit my drive to get things done, but I have to say I hope they learn how to manage it better than I do. There's a fine line between letting nothing stand in your way, and being obsessive. Mostly though, I hope that they inherit my commitment to imagining what it is like to walk a mile in the shoes of others. I try to be an open-minded, socially responsible person, and I hope my sons will live that way as well. No matter what their beliefs may be, I hope that they will always try to see things from others' perspective. They can disagree, they can be angry, they can even think the other person is completely wrong, but at least if they're trying to see life from another point of view, they can regard that person with compassion if not understanding. That understanding will help them better know their own beliefs and make them more accepting of both themselves and others.
A. Elliot's Lesson Learned: Walking a mile in someone else's shoes helps keep you on your toes and keeps you from putting your foot in your mouth.
This was in response to the Crazy Hip Blog Mamas question "What parts of yourself do you hope your child gets from you. "Labels: Crazy Hip Blog Mama Questions |
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And I love your lessons learned.